Day 112 has seen happy children, 3 Miles walked, 200 metres swum and a visit from a Dementor.
It has been another extremely wet day which has left me, post dog walks, rather drookit. (Soaked through). So there would be no better day to go swimming.
Apart from the drenching it was a great start to the day. The children were in fine fettle despite an early start this morning in order to get them away for skiing. They were walking around like one great big enormous smile that had taken over their whole heads and sat eating their breakfast mentally counting away the seconds before they were on the bus and heading towards the airport. I did manage to sneak in a quiet chat with them and a hug before they went and then I was packing suitcases into a car before being stood, waving them off in the rain. I was excited for them and looking forward to a really productive day.
Sadly something else had other plans though because at times, throughout the day, the Dementor would visit. Randomly and with no apparent rhyme or reason just drift into my space and try and suck any remaining shreds of hope or positivity from my very sole. It would hide in the shadows in the house, drifting in and out with the tide, appearing from nowhere to hunt me down and launch its relentless attack. It would make the most nonsensical noise as it drained me of my very life blood of any belief in myself. Of any belief that faith might help me. Of any belief that one day this would all be over. Of any belief that one day I might be healed. It just wouldn’t stop no matter what I did. Screaming and feeding until it found nothing left to feed on it would eventually drift off leaving me translucent, shaken, weak and empty. Empty of anything other than a nagging doubt, confusion and a depression. I sat at my desk suddenly feeling very tired. I just wanted to curl up and go to sleep. Give up and hope it goes away. Thankfully, I had booked a vets appointment for Georgie. She was convulsing regularly. Almost as if she was frightened of something in the house. As if she could sense something lurking and was frightened. It was all the excuse I needed to get out of the house. I put on a coat, a hat and a smile. I wanted to leave hopelessness behind me and find some positivity. To find something good and having seen how effectively Jordan attracted positivity with his smile in McDonalds yesterday I was going to try the same.
We went to the vet. I still wasn’t right and a little shaky but my strength seemed to come back the further away I walked. The vet beamed so positively as she examined Georgie and reassured me that it was unlikely to be anything too serious but a reaction to pain from her sore hips. More pain killers to try and ease further the pain she was suffering and a kidney bowl to get a urine sample for the vets. ‘Keep her going though if she enjoys the walks.’ Like a leech I fed on the vets positivity and left feeling much stronger. Hopefully Georgie was feeling better too.
Back home and time for lunch. I crept in to the house scouring the inside for the Dementor but nothing seen or heard. So poached egg on toast with broccoli, carrots, tomato and red grapes. I listened to music as I ate. The house seemed to be empty, quiet, eerily quiet but good. It was a peaceful lunch. I was going swimming in two hours so time for some admin. As I sat catching up with emails the noise started again. An incessant noise too extraordinary to try and describe. It was nothing like the noise made by the Harry Potter Dementor. It was just a long, unrelenting, nonsensical noise as it sucked, sucked and sucked until there was nothing left. Then it just dropped me cold, lifeless, leaving just the faintest sign of life. I lay my head on the desk wondering what to do next as the mental flatline coursed it’s long high pitched alarm through my body…………. Then hope. The faintest sparkle of a brain wave broke the flatline and then another. Then another. But that was enough to build on. To fight back from. The slightest chink of blue sky to reach for, with which to pull oneself out of the abyss. I was coming back. I could go and pack, slowly but pack my swimming kit and leave for the bus a little early. Walk slowly and just get some air. Get moving. Find something to hang onto. To pull me forward. As I walked, as so often happened to me on these low days a rainbow appeared in the dark grey sky and lifted my spirits. So it became a pleasant journey as I found some more handrails. Chatting to the Revd Andy Campbell as I waited for the bus. Telling him of all the incredible people I had met that had inspired and encouraged me while I hope to be able to do the same for them and others. Sadly my bus was on time and I had to curtail the conversation all too quickly but on the bus I was offered a seat by Calum, who was so badly injured in a car accident, so sat chatting to Calum, all the way to Callander. Even the wet walk up to the Leisure Centre was pleasant, surrounded by the moody mountains brooding over the loss of their snow to this mild air. But I still wasn’t normal. For the first time in weeks the initial indicators of a seizure such as flicks of unpleasant metallic odours were materialising behind my nose. At the swimming pool I rather foolishly planned to just quietly slip in. Crack on with 10 lengths and back out again. I was spotted and stopped to chat with a friend for a wee while which cheered me up further before heading over to the lifeguard Andrew who beckoned me over to him and had cleared the lane next to him so that he could keep an eye on me. I was embarrassed but later thankful for his diligent and thoughtful management of his duties. I got in and started swimming. First two lengths breaststroke with deep glides. Okay. Next two lengths backstroke with underwater glides at each turn. Not great. It just felt a little off balance. Next two lengths front crawl breathing on alternate sides every 3 strokes. Half way down the first length that noise came back. The incessant noise that wouldn’t stop and the Dementor sucked so hard that it felt as if I was being lifted from the water by my midriff. My bum lifted, I missed my stroke and in a fuddle still tried to breath. I spluttered and headed straight for the side in a splashy panic. Grabbed on and propped myself up coughing slightly to clear my airway. Right there by me was Andrew. He was reassuring as he checked that I was okay and knowing that he was there I determined to carry on. I finished the length and turned for another. This time no Dementor. Another two lengths front crawl and then the final two breaststroke with deep glides. 10 lengths completed with only a slight wobble while also a reminder to take it sensibly in these early stages of recovery from such a brain focussed pounding during treatment.
I was a little early for the bus so popped in to the Deli Ecosse for a decaf Mocha and a flapjack. I walked in with a smile on my face. I had survived todays challenge and not given in but Julie sensed that there was a little more behind my smile that I was perhaps a little weaker in posture than usual. I told her about the Dementor and how it was challenging my faith and with it my resolve to continue but at the same time tried to explain that my faith was strong enough to survive such a challenge with the support of friends in faith like Julie, Allie and Chris, who I am meeting for a walk tomorrow, but more customers came in so I went and took a seat to keep out of the way happy with the smile I received along with their understanding of me.
I caught the bus home and took Georgie out for a walk armed with my kidney bowl and surgical gloves to gather a urine sample for testing. It was quite easy when there are two of you with a magic peeing pot but on your own in the wind and the rain it was quite a challenge. I managed to catch about 5mms deep once poured into the testing pot so took her to the vet hoping it was going to be enough. The delightful veterinary nurse checked on the type of test Georgie required and thank fully confirmed it was enough. Kidney bowl returned, gloves removed it was time for home. I had a post to write.
The tough bit this evening seemed to be to decide whether or not today’s series of visits by the Dementor was seizure related or not. If it was a seizure that would of course re-set my driving licence clock back to the start of the countdown. I am not at all sure how to classify such a succession of very similar events that took place over an extended time period. Was it just one long partial seizure that wouldn’t go away until I washed it out of my hair after the swim. I wasn’t sure and certainly, as unpleasant as each passing of the Dementor was, it never culminated into that skull crushing head pressure, fuzziness and sweet metallic smells and tastes that accompanied the partial seizures. One thing I did know for sure was that if I had been driving when a Dementor passed over it would have been very dangerous. I am resetting the countdown. Frustrating, but tomorrow is another day and so far there do not appear to be any Dementors left in the house.
The great news for today though is that I have now crossed the £6,000 threshold with £6,050.77 raised so far. That is a sum and an achievement that not even the Dementor can rob me of. Every penny is going directly to the 5 charities and thank you to you all for providing it for them.
Oh and I received my first photo of Wee Archie G looking rather pleased with himself!
The challenge in numbers in total since the start:
Days completed: 112
Total Miles Cycled: 627
Total Miles Walked: 581.5
Total Miles Run: 32.7
Total Miles Paddled: 7
Total Distance Cycled, Skied, Ran and Rowed in the gym: 8.4
Total Distance Swum: 900 metres
Total Miles covered under own steam.1260.8
Total Height Gained under own steam: 31,973 feet
Mountains Climbed: 5
Hills Climbed: 18
Days of Voluntary Activity: 6.5
Organ tunes learnt and performed: 5
Salmon Caught: 0!
Curling Matches played in: 5
Curling stones placed on the button (the centre of the target): 1
Weight Training Sessions: 8
Aerobic Circuit Sessions: 4
Press Ups: 217
Pull Ups: 54
Sit Ups: 217
People Met and Hands Shaken: 355
Pots of tea shared: 23
Prayers joined on the top of a hill: 2
Prayers joined in the street!: 4
Prayers joined in a Train Station: 1
Pills popped: 486
Days until Driving Licence (lost to epilepsy) possibly Returned: 730
And most important of all – Money Raised as at Day 112 – £6,050.77
Considering I started this challenge 22 weeks ago very quietly with no target beyond a fiver, thanks to the brilliant advice from a friend of mine, I am absolutely thrilled and again thank you all. That is £54.02 for each and every day that I have managed to find the will and energy to do something worthwhile and my goodness it has been worth it for my peace of mind, for my healing and for the five wonderful charities you are supporting through your generosity. Long may it continue. May I also ask however that if you are not sponsoring me to please consider it for as much or as little as you can afford. My rate of revenue raising has slowed from £70.00 a day to £60.00 a day to £54.02 a day so please sponsor me and encourage your friends to as well.
Thank you all for your incredible comments and support. Please continue to spread the word.
If you see me around do please give a cheery hello and shake my hand or toot your horn and give a cheery wave to show your support and encourage me on.
Thank you for joining me on my own personal journey and encouraging me to walk, cycle, climb, paddle, sport and do good deeds each day to ‘Beat the Beast’ while helping to improve the lives and life chances of so many more people through sponsorship. The Five Charities that I have selected to support are:
- Cancer Research UK – My Father Succumbed to Lung Cancer; a couple of friends are currently fighting cancer and I am fighting a brain tumour. Let’s Help to Beat Cancer Sooner.
- The Prince’s Trust – Inspiring and preparing disadvantaged Young Lives for success.
- British Red Cross – helping those in need around the UK and the world whoever and wherever they are.
- World Wide Fund for Nature – For a Living Planet and a Future Where People and Nature Thrive.
- Help for Heroes – Support for our Wounded and their Families.
Learn more about my story that brought me to this point, how I plan to ‘Beat the Beast’, what activities I plan to do within the challenge and why.
How to Sponsor Me
The Beat the Beast Challenge is self funding through my own contribution while keeping costs to a minimum with voluntary support and corporate sponsorship in kind. Therefore the entirety of every penny donated will go directly to the 5 charities listed above. Please sponsor me by completing a standing order form either through your own personal internet banking or by completing a hard copy standing order form in your branch of your bank and then handing it in to the teller.
Thank you for having enough faith in me to sponsor me.
Yours aye
Archie